Threes have been on my heart since November. I can’t figure out why exactly. When I began to read more in depth about the enneagram three I had a series of emotions. (You can read the description of the enneagram three here.) First, I dismissed them. I couldn’t feel their wounds. Then, I was mad at them, because I was judging their perspective through the lens of my own. Finally, I felt and understood the wound. It hit me so hard. So here is my letter to the enneagram threes.
Your Wound
It physically pains me at the thought that your worth could be tied to what you achieve or accomplish. I hear you crying to be told you’ve earned the love you crave. Your heart has heard that affirmation is love, but it still leaves you empty. I wish you would have heard that your achievements don’t define you as a young person. Those things you accomplish are wonderful, but they are not all of who you are. You know this, but those that matter didn’t seem to see past that. For that, I’m sorry.
Your Masks
I imagine myself seeing you playing all the different characters you feel you must play. Each room you walk into is a new stage. The energy it must take for every crowd has to be exhausting. I see myself running and holding you so that you can just sit in who you really are. I want to create a bubble around you of authenticity. Filled with security and acceptance. And I want you to feel like all you have to be for a room is yourself.
You Are Loved
I cry for you. I pray over your heart. That you know how wonderful you are. That you can see yourself and the greatness that makes up who you are. Your greatness does not come from all of the things that you have accomplished. Your greatness comes from within yourself. Your greatness is you.
Loneliness does not have to be a consequence of your success. It is possible to be seen, just seen, and still loved. Open up your heart and let love reach you. I know this is hard, but this will change you on the inside.
Heal the Wound
I know you can be loved, because you have been seen. The parts of you that don’t shine have been seen. Expose your embarrassing core. Let go of your fear of failure. It is time to most past your ways of defending yourself.
You see, we need you. Your hope is what inspires us. Your encouragement is so unique and authentic. You connect to others in a way unlike anyone else. But first, always first, connect to yourself. Find the personhood that is in you. Your true self. From there, your natural leadership will take us places we could never go without you.
Find Your Wholeness
As I write this, my heart stops aching. Be whole. You did absolutely nothing to deserve the love that you have. Just receive it. Hold it and sit in it. You can absolutely achieve anything you decide to go after. No one wants to take that from you. However, you no longer HAVE to do anything for love. Just open your arms and heart and take it all in like the wind. The gentle breeze you didn’t make happen, but you get to enjoy.